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Archive for May 2019

Self-inquiry, let perception get bigger, why is this happening to me?, the 'i' claims responsibility, cause and effect, the appearance of free will, identification versus pure perception, overcoming fear, the energy behind manifesting ideas, avoidance, fear and developing intuition, responsibility is the ability to respond, what mind presents is not good enough

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The energy of desire, breaking the thinking mind, believing the body, something sees that can't be described, desire brings identity, dealing with stressful emotions, how can i cope with fear?, the need to protect, it is the destiny of the body/mind to be here in this moment, sickness and taking care without identification, trusting yourself, training the mind to have breaks in perception

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Free will and attention, waiting is a thought believed, working mind versus thinking mind, attachment to non-duality, establishing practical skills before awakening, the thought is before the emotion/decision making, desire to experience, pulling back from sexual addiction and self-love, you can't recognize what you are, mind experiencing mind and prior to oneness

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hiding in the karmic story, finding guidance from within, what is it that continues after death?, energy moving in the body; where does it come from?, how to use the mind?, Grace, where does the dream begin and end?, is liberation still in the movie?, so what's the point of enlightenment? is it possible to completely shed untruth while in a human form?, why Ramana was happy to die, what determines if the dead person has to come back in another body? what if we enjoy the creation and want to come back? the only way out is to realize that who you are was never in the movie, how is enjoyment still possible after awakening? what causes Jac to offer satsang? what do you know to be real? working through attachments and desires, is it always about destiny? how to deal with physical pain, hiding from love

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need to be right, investigate self-worth, give up experiencing, there is no autonomy at all, let go and let consequences take care of themselves, I Ching, self-forgiveness - embody it, I see what you really are, first was a sound, there is a capacity beyond consciousness

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getting lost in tough times, facing the poles, energy blockage of the body, flowing without rules, single relationship, letting life live through, keeping a distance, a place of clarity, the realm of true art

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Suffering, pure perceiving is there all the time, understanding will come, the body is resisting, letting go of the me, don't take anything personally ever, good and bad are the same, there's nothing but not even nothing, there's nothing wrong with the play, anything mind can present is a trick, allow personality to have its preferences, dropping desires, using fear as the primary motivator to take care of yourself, no such thing as mind, love is another thought, absolutely nowhere to land, cultivate devotion for what you are, feel the fear and do it anyway

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Fear of death, Attachment to experience, Specialness, Meditation, Stop being obedient to the mind, Do I exist?, Drop the controller, One dream, Spiritual Bypass, Progression in one direction keeps the seeker alive, Let devotion be cultivated and blossom, There is randomness yet mind wants to join the dots, Decision making from silence?, Paralyzed by options, fire your mind! just do what comes next, The questions will stop, Space as the first concept, time stops when every moment is fresh, Nothing to learn

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When ego is recognized don't indulge it, It's never about other people!, Love yourself deliciously, Don't be a slave to mind, First labeling then judging, All ability to see differences disappears, Spiritual techniques as a way of avoidance, There are no individuals, The world doesn't need an agenda of helping, Coming into the body, cultivating humility, The dreamer of the dream is in the dream, Let all understanding show itself to you, just watch for ego, Fear of intrusion, Beliefs give rise to everything you call the world

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Looking for love, learn to spot identification, Conceptual knowing is not enough, The gap is not a state of mind, a natural movement toward what you're not, trauma unraveling, No thoughts are real including this one, The whole thing collapses and falls in on itself, Seeing but nothing is seen, Arrogance is ultimately a lack of confidence, With pure seeing there is no commentary, Random sequencing, Attention is the gasoline that makes thoughts appear as real, Getting out of your comfort zone

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functioning of pure consciousness, Dropping the mind's desire to know, There's a place where mind can't go, This body is space; space doesn't exist, It's random and it's imagined, drop conceptual thought, Let non-mind knowing be center stage, An absence of nothing, Exploring the nature of freedom, Breaking patterns of mind, Who you think you are is just an idea, Nip desire be ordinary, Brutally self-honest, Every thought has within it the idea of the thinker

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Fear of madness, Whatever the destiny of the body-mind bring it on!, It shouldn't be like this, building or destroying the ego, Pure perception replaces judgment, Write the cheque and give gratitude!, Making the most of this illusion, No boundaries, There never was a you!, Create a space don't support the hypnosis, Resistance makes the ego solid

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Life-cycle of the ego, Being nothing is too much, Get your feet in the mud, The path of guru-disciple, What's this addiction to right and wrong?, Enjoyment happens, The only illusion is your idea of yourself, All of it same-same, Surrender: really just a mirror, thoughts are not real because the thinker is not real, Tears of joy, one word pointer, Getting nothing is that okay?, Does emotion equal identification?, Ownership is the lie, Vigilance is not difficult, When a choice has been made let it play out, Self-acceptance requires a decision, Let your self-image go to muck!, Marrying desire to the energy of survival

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No advantage in anything, No ownership at all, every moment is fresh without memory, Seeing how mind formulates the lie, The nature of everything is just space, A movement towards equanimity, Experiencing requires separation, How does this contraction create a woman?, Consciousness can't wake up, Even grace is a concept, Micro and macro concepts, Nothing can exist without a concept being believed, Cut the anchor!, The personal reference point is the problem, Dissolve into the flow, What is space?, Naked in the unknown, seeing same-same

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Something gets out of the way and life takes care of it, story of a breakup, Sending God a letter of resignation, Everywhere just magnificence!, What is power?, give up, nothing to figure out, Love and accept the personality just don't own it, It's a death not something better, Satsang: having fun while dissolving what you're not, What you are never left it, Who? No answer. Stay there!, A french kiss is just an idea

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Mind is a liar that's its job, Relaxed, fluid like water, Doing without attachment, Decision making, Memory, just a thought in the present moment, Powerful sticky thoughts, Feeling overwhelmed, Using Ramana?, Sustaining false identity is hard work, What I am is at home and it has nothing to do with mind, Dropping self-judgment

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Know you are light and take the light away, Seeing through spiritual desire, Embodiment and dissipating, The glee of noticing there was nothing, Looking for progress on the spiritual path, When to make effort, What is the point?, Seems like this is a bad deal, How does it all work?, Do the best you can, There's a movement towards harmony

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Attachment to a grandchild, Melt to go beyond the 'I AM', The work-reward loop, No solid group, The reference point of longing, The habit of creating a life, Not wanting to hear the truth, Seeing through the 'I', Can awakening happen easily? Stop buying the story of waking up, The nature of intention

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Not deserving and not worthy, Train mind to watch the story, Not wanting to be a dufus, When judgment reinforces separation, Let your thinking become unlimited, Find the authentic humble human, The `I don't know' phase, Letting go of the reference point, Cultivate gratitude to keep grace moving

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Holding on to the identity of provider, Love without attachment, Placating others is manipulation, How we are being lived, Seeing through the acceptance of conditioning, Non-resistance to resistance, Find arrogance, What is it like for the Jac character?, Looking to fill the space, Tuning into the frequency of fear

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What if nothing phenomenally happened in this retreat?, Mind creates a story of awakening, Grasping energy and the gap, Pure perception, Finding the one who 's trying to get it right, Fear of being worthy, Why did fear come back?, Get to know the nature of desire, Mind wanting a reward for silence, Mind wanting a meaning, Resistance turns off enjoyment, Techniques can be useful, Not wanting to let go into humility

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Meditation - death of the thinking mind, Presence is a trick of mind, Dropping the desire to be a writer, What can be surrendered, Transmission is phenomenal, Psychic abilities, let there be space for seeing decisions are automatic, Not my will but Thine, Is there a mental practice?, Reincarnation and desire, Take it slowly and allow thoughts, Not knowing as a benign place for mind to hang out, What is love?, Love takes care of itself, Play with I don't know

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Spiritual horse trading, should the world be fair? judgment and comparison, Peace, rest, and happiness? no such thing as an, Drop all desire; now is enough, a post­rational psychic, do you really want out of the movie? silence is so potent! personality doesn't need an, what you are cannot be seen, every state of mind is a fantasy, keep going until there is no mystery anywhere in consciousness, none of it matters; what experiences does destiny still require? enlightenment is not an experience, negotiation with an addictive thought pattern doesn't work, let all things come and go

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Mind can only see what it is not, you're not here at all, assumptions that are not questioned, depends on your perspective, knowing that you're not the character, mistaken identity, there's no here, zero tolerance for, is spirituality serious? let everything get light!, why keep coming back to satsang? beliefs have to go, let life have its way with you, the world doesn't need fixing, kundalini energy, follow your feet, keep it simple, Let a role happen and know that you're not it.

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Mind's one true statement, lying to protect self­-image, judgment is just what the ego does, fluid like water, mind seeks advantage, only the ego can connect, getting distance from the controller, all that happens is that the ego dies, don't be a slave of the thinking mind, self­-love must be established first, internet dating and relationships, what is the point of anything? are you a character in the movie?, Trading identities, Living with existential fear

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What you are can't be present or absent, the search must be exhausted, samadhi, life taking care of itself, gaps between thoughts, experiences are just another story, let rest come, satsang is a fantasy too, the greatest show on earth never was, seeing without something being seen, working with pain, the identified state is pain and suffering, managing day to day, everything and its opposite, that which I cannot name, drop the labeling, what I am is not in the movie, outside of consciousness, personal, consciousness doesn't need a human mind to be aware of itself, decision making

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Does self­-realization happen in consciousness? no crock of gold! self­-realization versus liberation, action disconnected from concepts, what if nothing were to happen ever again? mind needs goals, the believing mechanism collapses, free will, feeling can't come before thought, drop the dropper, self doesn't watch this movie, what you are is not in the illusion, pre­-awakening, place for virtues, love is still a concept, a story about death, no, no death, feels real until it's seen that it's not, functioning without ownership, the character is just an idea In between the thoughts

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be still, physical pain, separation, prior to consciousness, non- conceptual knowing, meditation/non-meditation, no-self, contraction in base chakra, dissolution of ego, bucket list, belief, the controller, natural order, jac's experiences, fear of annihilation, Awareness, non-attachment, presence, randomness, beingness, pure consciousness, self-image, tired of everything, natural state, past lives, time, window at death, concepts create experiences, a song

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nothing going on, Pure perception, Awareness, linear time, real life and awakening, understanding desire, beyond the senses, believing, judgment, sense of incompleteness, naming things, thinking mind and working mind, wanting a soul mate, character on movie screen, depression and medication, manifestation, therapy, all stories, fear of loss, familiarity, hopelessness

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Even pain is to be enjoyed, out-of-body experience, labeling has to stop, watch conceptual thought, Jac's experiencing, relationships, prior to observer, existential fear is the most potent, wallowing in self-pity, what Jac's family thinks, go into depression, equanimity seems like insanity, everything is perfect underneath concepts, working too much, kinesiology, there's no free will, common sense toward the body, suspecting denial, fairness

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Nothing to do, wisdom and hierarchy, pain of isolation, relationship obsession, no reference point, identification with the body, fear of rejection in relationship, healing your life, fun and breaking the rules, mirror, fear of non-existence, practical things, you cannot be what you are, about jac's shift, karma, me holding me back, fear of power being destructive, very reactive, gratitude, traumatic dreams

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Desire for a relationship, deepening practice, discernment around fear, fun, sitting with problems without direction, on the fence, self-image, dysfunctional relationship, compassion for self, healing ego, knowing, everything and its opposite, Enjoyment happens

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No individual, no reference point, Contraction, Attention, the habit of fear, pain and suffering, power plays, hesitancy around wanting to live, seeking stopped, self-doubt, a personal loving god, 12-step program, perfection, non-duality and experiencing, powerless, Courage, want to know who I am

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Non-duality and therapy, self-image, 'non-seeking' seeker, the buzz of something new, abuse and sadness, called to do certain jobs, spiritual bank account, huge fear of letting go, resistance and control, Ownership, role of the body in awakening, desire to be well, experiencing is your teacher, ability to observe timelines, manifesting destiny

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The play of consciousness, busy mind, effort, consciousness defined, honesty, jac's style of satsang, Desire, disorganized, fear of losing the “I”, great heart, attachment, depression, business outcome, conditioning, an extreme path, work, 'intellectual' awakening, compassion, free will, knowing truth, lucid dreaming, relative reality

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Self-honesty, two levels of techniques, acceptance becoming self-destructive, mind thinking it's on to the game of mind, what happens when desire falls away, let the doer waste time, dropping beliefs, saying ‘not this’ to love, the desire to get back to the crack, excess energy hijacking love, seeing a pattern, investigate the familiar

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Let the image fail, rejecting the ‘I’ as an ego defense, attachment to specialness, trust, surrender and identification, find ways to listen to the pull 24/7, find out what you are not, no solid reference point, pure perceiving, breaking up with separation

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Passive versus active allowing, nature of time and space, the play of power, difficulty in body functioning, Prior, life is a dream, the revenge cycle, can consciousness know itself? self-forgiveness, when desire falls away, decision making follows action

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How to know self-love is established, thinking mind versus working mind, the right and wrong mechanism, absolute knowing, slowing down, is there a practice? self-honesty leading to self-enfoldment, who does the inquiry? existence is a myth, let the pull be enough, expansion of unity consciousness

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Ping-ponging between macro and micro, awakening versus spiritual experiencer, seeing through the character, desire for knowing, how to observe and not attach to judgment, cultivating self honesty, efforting with a belief in failure, waste time to find the free flow, cultivate self-honesty, let go of compromise, be true to yourself, no expectations in relationships, become invisible

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Meditation – desire and distraction, a value system of needing silence is a problem, dependency on people, be alright with no purpose, let go of the need to understand, being honest with yourself, martial arts, karma and the desire for revenge, self-destruction, the role of intellect, desire as a concept

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Responsibility, the living is where the fear is, is consciousness dependent on humanity?, following the loop of belief, let there be vigilance, every step is away from what you are, feeling my own pain, it's all fantastic (from inside the dream), ultimately it's just entertainment, seriousness and finding lightness, creating games within games, I'm okay and imagining there's a life being lived, seeing blue and the color of truth, the law of attraction, move away from the loop of suffering, let thinking arise (or not), desire and the desire to let go of desire, the release when thoughts lose their power, nothing is solid, observing and mind training mind/ fears and self-judgement, train children for example, awakening vs. liberation

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Just perception happening, objectless consciousness, what is this me and why am i still believing it?, belief in me/where does the i stop and start?, the fraudulent movement of "i" (I'm not going to be done in again), guilt and the role of mother, seeing behind awareness or THE WORLD IS ABOUT BULLSHIT!!!

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Place of rest beneath the crisis, refinement of conditioning, rejection or acceptance is fine, avoiding exposure, not having to love your mother, qualities of 'behind and below', the desire to move forward, prior to all of it, inner child, holding onto noble virtues, protecting oneself from abuse of power, craving to be noticed, mind needs to know its limits

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Lack of self-love, The heart needs to fill itself, Consciousness is independently aware of itself, There is a knowing of itself that is not conceptual, Some projects aren't meant to manifest, Your own is basis alone to follow things up.

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Is consciousness aware of itself? Fear of death, Never give up on a chance of surrendering, Giving up security, Some experiences have to have you, Is pain being experienced or is there a sufferer?, The doing is doing through you, The purpose of guilt is to block

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Irresponsibility and letting go of the ego, jumping off the cliff and letting go of service, there seems to be choice...?, survival anxiety, mantra is health food for the mind and questions of identity, jumping from one idea to another of how it should be!, I am not a separate being, consciousness imagines difference, grounds for grace, enlightenment is rubbish, to break the vow, I can get it wrong, it's only the personal I that takes it seriously

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The sense of "I" is making the effort, non-ordinary (altered) states may loosen the "I", I am here as awareness, fear draws me into the "I", the desire to know the truth is the last desire, in a destructive place, serving the world, resistance: I want it my way, there is no reference point and judgment keeps duality going, the way of the seeker

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Satsang happens beneath the words, Mind will never know, but still it will be known, Does the idea of you create a you?, What is the purpose of life?, the I is an addiction, Fear of death, Identification with the body makes stories seem real, Who wants to be enlightened?, Beautiful, Every moment is the same

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The need to be needed, financial aid and emotional maturity, powerlessness, the hypnosis (that the world is real), I want to be taken care of

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